Going With the Flow

Ellevate Network
4 min readApr 3, 2023

By: Tosca DiMatteo

Last month felt like a MONTH and a HALF, even though it was still just a month.

I had big lofty goals for a sexy newsletter to send you. And when I say sexy I mean full of deep reflections and my best tips for transforming your life. But it’s the last day of the month and I haven’t written a thing.

So what happened to my plan? Well, I’ll tell you…

The top of the month started spectacularly… I had great momentum on my business; I booked an inner critic keynote, a paid engagement with NYU, and new coaching clients in the pipeline. But before I could fully celebrate these big wins, WHAM — I was hit by an email hacker.

[Related: Influential Leadership: Eight Things You Need to Master to Develop Your Resolve]

I’m not gonna lie, this felt like a familiar pattern of big wins and then gut-wrenching setbacks. But THIS TIME was gonna be different. And it WAS different. Because I immediately went into acceptance and gratitude.

I accepted that I had to stop everything and address my digital security issues. I accepted that I was going to have to spend some money on expert help so that I could prevent this from happening again. I accepted that despite having gotten hacked in January, I didn’t address it in the way I needed to then. I accepted all of it.

I accepted that this is what happens when you’re an entrepreneur and that this wasn’t an interruption to my plan, that this was the PLAN that the universe sent me to address.

This was the epitome of being very careful about the stories I was telling myself.

And so I was in gratitude. I was in gratitude that I had to create a stronger foundation for my information security. Because if you recall from my blog last month, this is the year I am living my life all in! And you know what was even crazier? My schedule kept clearing out! Space kept opening on my calendar last minute, which enabled me to plow through doing all the tedious back-end things I needed to do. I was grateful for the IT company that was referred to me and grateful for getting everything figured out before the inevitability of my exponential business growth this year.

This experience gave me a chance to reflect on my own growth:

  • I didn’t let my inner critics run amok. (By the way, this is the bread and butter of how I help my clients — so if you also want to stop with the destructive inner narrative, reach out to me here.)
  • I didn’t focus on what I wasn’t doing, and instead celebrated myself for honoring what was most important based on the changing circumstance.
  • I let my inner peace prevail. And let me tell you, 2022 was a journey to stop fighting myself — and just love the heck out of ALL of me.

In other words, I gave myself permission to be in flow of what was.

[Related: Seven Strategies to Transform Your Career and Boost Your Success]

Because the truth was I couldn’t focus on anything else until I felt all my information was secure and trust could be fully restored to my email.

So, here I am on the very last day of my newsletter commitment that I made to not just my business, but to you. I’m publishing my not so perfect, not so polished lessons and realizations from the month that I hope also give you pause to reflect on your own life.

And in case you were wondering, my tech issues are a wrap, my coaching calls have been FIRE good, the Going All In program that I launched to help people with their career breakthrough is incredible and life-giving, and prospect calls are alive and well.

All proof to say even when plans change, it can all still work out just fine.

So, I’ll leave you with these questions to consider:

  • In what ways are you or aren’t you giving yourself permission to be at peace with what is?
  • How are you truly quieting your inner critics, and choosing to be your own best friend?
  • How is life happening FOR you, even when on the surface it feels otherwise?
  • What gratitude do you have for this past month?
  • What do you need to be in acceptance of?

By the way — if you feel inspired to work on your inner critic, I offer a two-month starter coaching package for new clients. Contact me if you want to learn more here.

Cheers to the past month, I thank you and bid you farewell. New month, I welcome you with open arms!

If you’re eager for the new month and spring to start springing, know that it is now that all the seeds are growing underground. So even if you can’t see the fruits of your labor quite yet, remember that there is ALWAYS magic happening below the surface.

[Related: Receiving and Giving: Dealing with Disconnection]

Tosca DiMatteo supports businesses to create people-centric cultures and individuals to experience transformational change to live their truth unapologetically. For details, email her at breakthrough@toscadimatteo.com to get started or schedule an exploratory call here.

Originally published at https://www.ellevatenetwork.com on April 12, 2023.



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